POWER AND CONTROL

I never talk much about my abuse or the specifics simply because it is too painful to re-live.  Although that doesn’t really matter much when you are re-victimized on a daily basis for standing alongside other battered mothers that are in my position.  The countless mothers that I have spoken to over the years and listening to their heartaches was bad enough for my mental health but now being attacked by others who allegedly have the same goals is simply too much.  I think thought it’s high time to shift gears and allow those that think they may know me and show them what I am and what depths of hell that I have been through.  I’ll start with the event that took place in late 1997 at the hands of my second abuser.  I will no longer be silent and I have risen above my pain.  For this is why I am who I am and why I tirelessly help others that share this heartache and nightmare.

It was after my divorce and during a lengthy custody battle where I met the second abusive man in my life.  During this time I found myself pregnant with this man’s child.  He didn’t treat me bad in the beginning but then again if he would have punched me in the face during our first date I can venture to say there would not have been a second one.  Abusers don’t operate that way, there is a process a “grooming” process of wearing you down and making sure that your defenses are low.

I was homeless, my children were being ripped from my life and I found myself living with a man that I should have listened to all the red flags, I didn’t.  The year was 1997 and the month must have been between November and December as I was five months pregnant.  I was twenty-nine years old and the pregnancy, my fourth child, was very wearing on me.  I am sure the ongoing verbal abuse from my abuser wasn’t helpful.  Not to mention the ongoing divorce/custody battle for my three older daughters.  I remember being exhausted and went to bed early that night.  I knew that my abuser was angry about it but I was just too tired to listen anymore and went to bed.  Sleep came easily and I remember that my sleep was the type that was deep and restful.

I am sure it was a divine intervention to which I received my deep slumber as the following events would change my life forever. My eyes slit open as I could feel the sun peeking through the bedroom window.  But something was strange; I couldn’t stretch or move my arms.  I opened my eyes to find my abuser and the father of my child standing at the foot of the bed. He was laughing.  I finally could open my eyes fully and forced myself to be wake up.  I looked at him and his face seemed different, his laugh was not the same, I knew I was in trouble as my heart began beating out of my chest.  I looked up and found that my wrists were tied with a yellow nylon rope to the headboard.  Strangely my legs were free, for now.  His laughter became louder as I tried to wiggle my wrists free but the more I tried the more pain came on my wrist from the nylon rope intertwining with other fibers of nylon making it tighter.  I asked him what the hell he was doing.  He couldn’t stop laughing.  I became angry and yelled that he needed to untie me now!  That’s when the laughter stopped.  I knew that when he was in the mood to fight this was the way he started it.  He came near my head and whispered in my ear as evil as you can imagine that he was coming for what he was “denied” last night.  My heart jumped as I knew something bad was going to happen to me and there was nothing I was going to be able to do about it.  He lifted me under my ribs and flipped me from my side and over onto my stomach.  I told him that he was hurting me and the baby.  He said nothing.  I begged him to allow me to lie on my back but he ignored every plea.  Nothing.  He grabbed the back top of my pajama pants and ripped them straight down the back.  I began to cry and tried to plead with him to stop.  Again, no response.  He was now naked and on top of my back as he pushed my face deep in the pillow to muffle my sobbing and screaming.  Finally, he spoke as he told me that if I was quiet he would untie me.  I quickly acquiesced and became silent and to be as still as I could be lying on my pregnant stomach.  Then he started laughing again.  He loved this torture; he was in control of my physical body and now my brain.  I couldn’t see him but only hear and feel the weight on my pregnant body.  I will skip some of the dirty little details of what transpired next.  But I will tell you that it was almost immediately after I obeyed his directives that I saw white and felt searing pain, my baby was moving as I could feel her moving slightly under the pressure.  I screamed in pain but it only made it worse as he loved to hear my screams of pain.  I couldn’t believe that I was being sodomized by a man who allegedly loved me with his baby inside of me.  After what seemed like forever he finally stopped and walked out of the room.  My body was in so much pain I feared that my baby would die from the pressure and trauma to my insides.  I knew I was bleeding as felt it run down my thighs.  I began to weep silently so he couldn’t hear me.  I was still tied with the rope and my wrists were on fire from the friction.  I hoped that he was done and that he would leave me alone, I was wrong.  It was almost immediately after I thought that when he returned.  I glanced at him through my tears and noticed he had a video camera.  My torture was far from over.  For hours I was raped and sodomized by the father of the child in my womb and now it was being captured on video.  My heart sank as my humanity was taken with every abuse.  I was scared for my baby.  I didn’t know if we were going to make it.  He finally left me alone as the afternoon began to wane. Alone and still tied up.  I laid there in my blood clutching the headboard to ease the pain on my wrists.  This was the beginning of the end of who I was and forever more I would be changed.  He came back and I winced when I saw him.  He had a small smile on his face of success.  Success in breaking me but not my spirit.  That’s when the yelling began, the name calling, the total degradation.  He got even angrier when he was finally trying to un-tie me as it was “my” fault that he couldn’t get the rope un-tangled due to my constant movement.  Once free, he ordered me out of bed and to clean up “my” mess.  I could barely move.  My hands were numb and my legs were weak.  I didn’t look him in the eye I could only just focus on getting feeling back into my extremities.  I complied with his orders and tried to get dressed but he ripped my clothes from my hands and demanded that I clean his bed up first.  I had to listen to him, what more could I do?  I was scared he would rape me again.  I took the sheets off the bed as I was sobbing silently as I walked past him to the laundry room.  He followed me and continued on watching me and criticizing the amount of detergent I used to the way I put the sheets in the washer.  He warned me that they had better not be ruined.  I hurriedly put the water on cold and set the washer on maximum as I hoped that the blood would be removed.  He was finally he was bored with me and left me alone.  I found some clean clothes and tried to head for the shower.  He was back spitting in my face as he told me that a “whore like me” wasn’t allowed to use his bathroom.  He told me that I had to go bathe in the lake across from his house.  My head was bent low.  My whole body was just waiting for him to strike again and I knew he could sense my fear and he loved every minute of it.

With him in control he ordered me to get dressed and to get dinner started.  I complied and said nothing in fear for any retaliation that he may perceive as defiance.  My heart was broken but if I had only known this was only the beginning of my torture I would have ran out that door as fast as I could.  But I was trapped.  Trapped by the fear of being homeless, penniless and pregnant.  I had no family or friends that would help, the other abuser made sure of that.  It was one of the lowest points of my life.  I tried to make this abuser stop abusing me.  I loved him and wanted him to be happy for the baby.  Nothing worked as everything I did was wrong and everything bad that happened to him was my fault (actually still is after all these years).

I can look back now and obviously write about this trauma with strength and courage as I know he can never hurt me again.  There was no reason to do the things he had done to me through the years and then to our child.  He is sadistic man with a severe, untreated mental illness.  I would hope that others out there reading this and are in a relationship with someone like this.   Run, don’t walk.  Leave while you can.  You cannot change an abuser and you will get hurt or even kiled.

I am happy to report that in this year, 2013, I am very happily married to the man of my dreams.  A real man that doesn’t hit screams, call me names or rape me.  My husband knew full well how much baggage I had when I met him. But rather than pushing aside this baggage he helped me to unpack it and I did.  I can say that I have been abuse free since 2005.  I took away the one thing that my abuser wanted so badly and that was power and control.  I took it back, my life, my body, my sanity, forevermore.

Lyrics | U2 lyrics – The Unforgettable Fire lyrics

A Voice for Men uses pic of brutalized woman to illustrate post blaming feminists for domestic violence

Reblogged from man boobz:

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If you want to show someone what sort of website A Voice for Men is, have them look at the following screenshot, which I’m putting below the jump because it may well trigger some readers in its depiction of the effects of domestic violence on women:

Read more… 931 more words

RE-VICTIMIZING OVER AND OVER AGAIN. All together now..."The wheels of ABUSE go round and round"

Will the REAL abuser please stand up?

Battered mothers across sea to shining sea will all agree that they (abusers) are the same.  We’ve been told to take our “passion” out of speaking to the judges,  dress conservatively, don’t wear red (even though we’ve had a few rebels) act like a “lady” and then MAYBE just maybe the judge and other court personnel will treat you like a “human”.  In the perfect world we mothers like to believe that possibly one time we will be listened to, the evidence weighed carefully but most of all we hope that they will treat us like any one of them would want  their  mother, aunt, sister, cousin or daughter treated in family court as victim of domestic violence.  Battered mothers in family courts are special creatures.  You see we are the ones who, so far, have beaten the odds of being killed by an intimate partner.

The statistics show we are the “lucky” ones.  But when we enter the arena of family court we don’t often feel so lucky after all.   It’s bad when you may think to yourself that death would have been a better fate than continual litigation by your former abuser, the actual legal term is “vexatious litigation”, but don’t bother trying to use it in family court, doesn’t work that way for mothers.  Like the other favorite legal tactic by abusers the infamous PAS a.k.a. parental alienation syndrome, don’t get me started.  Point is that it can be  extremely hard for a victim to walk into the lair of family court and know who her enemy is.  I myself when I walked through the hallowed halls of Oconto County Wisconsin mistakenly thinking that people of power will protect my children and I.  Not only is advocacy needed for domestic violence victims to leave the abuser or “awareness” for those who apparently live in a delusional world where mommies don’t get hit by daddies.  They do.

The new “survivor” will need the ammunition for when she is summoned to family court by her abuser, because he’s not done with her yet.  It goes back to the abusers own “ego” where they too believed we would never leave them and when we do it’s earth shaking for a controlling asshole.  But now he has “friends” in the shape of legal personnel that will look upon you with disdain. Through the many battered mothers that have formed relationships with other battered mothers from all parts of the world we have learned that even though our stories may be different their is always the common denominator  the abuser.  If I had a dime for every battered mother that has heard other battered mothers plights of family court hell, say “sounds exactly like MY abuser”, I would have enough money in a legal fund to help millions of mothers.

During these final weeks of “Domestic Violence Awareness” month we hope to that the general public also is “aware” that after daddy loses control over mommy he goes after the children, it’s the abusers way, he’s not done with you until he says so.

The aim and dedication of this blog, and many others that have flooded the internet since 2008, are made for battered mothers who have been to hell and back, to show the world what they are doing to us.  The wheels of abuse most certainly go “”round and ’round” and only some survive.   Now that the other women are awakening with the “War on Women” we can only hope still that one day a mother can leave her abuser safely with her children.  Unlike the “cookie cutter” shape of the abuser, we are individuals but our commonality is that we are loving mothers who will stop at nothing to save our children and future generations of females and to put an end to these human rights violations.

STARVING FOR JUSTICE

For decades now, mothers that have survived domestic violence and family court have continued to scream for justice, now they’re starving for it, literally.  This week in Arizona a mother has made the ultimate sacrifice not only her body but for all mothers that are used and abused by the family court system, she has begun a hunger strike.

In Arizona a judge ordered that a mother be placed in jail for arrears in child support.  Now mind you this mother does not get to see her children in a normal setting to begin with.  This mother, like the thousands of others, is a “non-custodial” mother.  She’s not just a “non-custodial” she is also a domestic abuse survivor, for whatever that’s worth these days anyways.  A domestic violence survivor or victim will receive the worst treatment from the family court system than any other judicial “branch” (besides a rape victim).  But it’s the same if you were raped it was YOUR fault, if you were abused it was YOUR fault.  After 100 years of women in the early 19th century fighting for the right to vote we are still at a place where women are oppressed.  We make less than men, work more and get our children taken away.   Now if all that’s not bad enough at insult to injury when you are thrown into the family court arena.  Now you are “forced” to “co-parent” with your abuser.  That’s right, not only does he have access still to your life he then does everything in his powers (by way of his attorney who is the judges golfing buddy, oh and didn’t I tell ya…the judge knows the abusers dad…they go waaaay back, and the GAL oh yeah he’s golfing buddies with them all too).  Once the abuser becomes the master manipulator that he is and gets by with a  lot of help from his dads friends, soon gets custody.  Then after that it continues with supervised visits (because you are a bad mother in whatever fictitious label they can pin on you) and soon after comes the child support because even though he makes more than you do with working two or three jobs… he can’t do it ALL BY HIMSELF.  My mother did.

Family Court Judges, lawyers, psychologists and other supporters of female victims to interpret the effects and impacts of abuse as equivalent to passivity, incompetence, and poor mental health. So what can women and their supporters do to combat this social problem? http://www.speakoutloud.net/helping-women/language-of-resistance-in-family-court/

Mothers that have been abused should AVOID family court at all costs.  They should run as fast as they can away, far far away from the abuser, because IF there isn’t “placement order” in place at the time of escape your chances are better than him tracking you down and THEN trying to get the children. ALWAYS have your children in YOUR care and custody. Even IF the abuser just wants to take the kids for “one night”.  Do not fall for the trickery. Many mothers have lost their children this way. Either by the abuser claiming HE had custody (just as mine did) or running off with them or even worse, murder.

So with all this in mind you should also be “aware” that these travesties are not something “new” the courts are doing.  This has been going on for decades.  This started in the 1980′s when more mothers returned to work and became more independent and decided they didn’t need a “Mr. Mom”.  When they began the child support system that spurned the phrase “dead beat dad” for the era that’s when the men folk starting fighting back and then abusers caught on that this system could work to their advantage since we wanted equality after all…didn’t we?

We did and we still do, but even in the year 2011 it is far off.  The right to vote, 19 th amendment was the last and only rights that women have in the constitution.  But if you want to count the 14th amendment which states,

No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

Then again that would mean WE (as in women) have equality in this nation right?  Not really.  With the recent political atmosphere with state governments and their power grabs and war on women’s reproductive rights, we are losing “rights” every day. The women of the 1970′s that started a revolution of women yearning for the Equal Rights Amendment, here we are in the new millennium with only 38 states out of 50 that have “ratified” the ERA.  How much longer?

Now, at this very moment an Arizona mother has taken all she can.  Not unlike the women’s suffragists who went on hunger strikes for the right to place a ballot, she is too.  This mother works two jobs and has limited contact, if any, to her children.  Her abuser has hidden assets and comes from a very “well off” family.  He’s not doing it because he’s starving, he’s doing it because he can.  Years of family court conflicts, collusion and cronyism have taken its toll on this mothers soul.  This woman has decided that she would rather starve and be hospitalized because it matters not what the courts can do to her, THIS is a politicized statement that the family court system is corrupt and we’re not taking it anymore.  We’ve signed petitions, played the niceties with government officials who’ve gave us lip service, we’ve sacrificed our children and our savings accounts, we’ve marched the streets of Washington DC on Mother’s Day, we are done trying to get your attention, we DEMAND it now.

Yesterday was “Day One” of the hunger strike, we are now on “Day Two”.  This mother says she must come up with $2,000 in 60 days or she will be put in jail, per judges orders.  This mother is more deteremined than ever to get out of the circle jerk of family court.  She’s lost everything but her free will.  Perhaps this will be the one thing that she can conrol in her life since her abuser and his colluders continue their rage against her.

So Day Two is sliding into Day Three and I know with all my heart that the tenacity of this mother she is not giving up and we need to stand by her.  I cannot with any good conscience not sound the trumpets for the triumphant return of the suffragists spirits to rise again with us and guide us to freedom of enlslavement of the patriarchy  My prayer and mantra is that we begin our first voyage into the unknown world  non-violent protest.  I beg all victims of the family court system  and their allies align their voices and let the world know we will not ignored.  In the same vane as our Foremothers did and their daughters of the 70′s ERA movement. But this time we really DO get equal rights.

Stay tuned as this blog is about to expose EVERY one of the corrupt family court officials from Arizona

EUGENE BOWMAN a Murderer walking Free – BEWARE!!! Mother and daughter, Tina and Bethany Sinclair Vanished w/o a Trace « Battered Mothers-A Human Rights Issue

EUGENE BOWMAN a Murderer walking Free – BEWARE!!! Mother and daughter, Tina and Bethany Sinclair Vanished w/o a Trace « Battered Mothers-A Human Rights Issue.

February 4, 2010 marked the 9th Anniversary of the Disappearance of Tina and Bethany Sinclair.
Mother and daughter, Tina and Bethany Sinclair have been missing from Mountain Road in West Chesterfield, NH since Feb. 4th, 2001.

Please ring the phones off the hook this OUTRAGE!!!!

Please join us, and repost!

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Our new Facebook Page

has been established for discussions about our case.  Please join us:
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Missing-Tina-and-BethanyOrg/163575153653706?ref=mf

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Last update:  December 2009 - the NH Cold Case Unit, recently granted and established, has now been handed our case to consider……

If you have any information about my missing sister, Tina Sinclair, and my missing niece, Bethany Sinclair, please contact me at: mypurplestar@aol.com, webmaster@missingtinaandbeth.org,  or the newly formed NH Cold Case Unit: http://doj.nh.gov/coldcaseunit/listing/bethany-sinclair.htm

Maura Murray is also missing from NH.

Sincerely, Sharon Garry family and friends

Registration of Criminal Offenders

http://www4.egov.nh.gov/nsor/Display.aspx?offenderID=2798

Date of Photo
1/3/2010

BOWMAN, EUGENE V. JR
Alias(es): Bowman, Van

Last Reported Address:
P – 34 Pond Brook Rd West Chesterfield, NEW HAMPSHIRE 03466 Cheshire County
Date of Birth: 12/27/1958
Age: 51

Race: White
Sex: Male
Height: 6’4″

Hair: Brown
Eyes: Brown
Weight: 225 lbs.

Other Relevant Physical Descriptions:
Scars, Marks, Tattoos, Piercings:
SCARS: Leg, left

Court: Cheshire
Adjudication Date: 5/23/2001

Qualifying Offense(s):
NH RSA 632-A:2, II Aggravated Felonious Sexual Assault (Victim under 13 y.o.)

NH RSA 632-A:2, II Aggravated Felonious Sexual Assault (Victim under 13 y.o.)

NH RSA 632-A:2, II Aggravated Felonious Sexual Assault (Victim under 13 y.o.)

Status of Parole, Probation or Supervised Release: Parole Date: 4/10/2016

Criminal History:
Agg. Fel. Sex. Assault 632-A:2  Conviction Date: 2/6/2001
Agg. Fel. Sex. Assault 632-A:2  Conviction Date: 2/6/2001
Agg. Fel. Sex. Assault 632-A:2  Conviction Date: 2/6/2001

BOWMAN is required to register under New Hampshire law. Positive identification cannot be established unless a fingerprint comparison is made.

* Address Types:
P = Permanent Address
S = School Address
T = Temporary Address

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New Hampshire Department of Safety | 33 Hazen Drive | Concord, NH 03305
TDD Access: Relay NH 1-800-735-2964 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 1-800-735-2964 end_of_the_skype_highlighting

SET IN STONE

Kansas is poised to replace its statue of politician John James Ingalls in the U.S. Capitol’s National Statuary Hall with Amelia Earhart as soon as funding is secured, making her the 10th woman to be honored there (out of 100).  The aviator and bestselling author was the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.

If you look into the eyes of Ms. Earhart you cannot help but to notice her confidence and determination.  She was a woman who broke barriers and gender stereotypes.  What is it about Kansas women that feed the fire that make them determined to stand up for what is right?

The same steel reserve that has forced another woman in Kansas to regain her rights as parent has once again fallen on deaf ears.   Judge David Debenham was manipulated into believing that Claudine Dombrowski should not have parenting time and order so.  As one blogger stated:

People are outraged everywhere.  The last time  the 15 year old daughter called to cancel her two hour Sunday visit she is allowed each week with her mother, she was crying on the phone and said she couldn’t come.  Abuser Hal Richardson was yelling in the background, and the daughter cried more.  Dear Claudine told her daughter it was okay, that everything would be okay.  That was it.  After that, not even a phone call to cancel, Hal Richardson failed to produce the daughter at the Topeka Police Station as he was ordered to do.  Nothing.   And the court let him get away with all 67 violations of this court order on August 20th.

With Kansas having a reputation as a progressive state with many firsts in legislative initiatives—it was the first state to institute a system of workers compensation (1910) and to regulate the securities industry (1911).  Kansas also permitted women’s suffrage in 1912, almost a decade before the federal constitution was amended to require it.  It would now appear that Judge Debenham does not subscribe to the same progressive thoughts as other Kansans.  An American citizen can normally appear to have the same rights as the forefathers fought for us, especially Freedom of Speech, but not in Debenham’s court.  Now Debenham’s gavel has punished a Mother for trying to be a Mother, for exposing the criminals of family court and especially for the interests of her abuser.

It should be an embarrassment for any Kansan that this is how Debenham treats, Mothers/United States Citizens, doing what they have every right to do.   This progressive state with a long list of famous, innovative and ground breaking citizens from Earheart to Eishenhower you would expect better…then again Kansas does have the world’s biggest ball of twine.

With all of  her struggles within the court system and she hasn’t given up on her daughter and she never will.  Claudine is a modern Amelia Earhart, also on a perilous journey, navigating the unpredictable family court system, where you never know which basic human right they will take from you, especially Motherhood.

JUST US

Rights for Mothers | Resources and Support for Noncustodial and Custodially-Challenged Mothers.

Tonight a letter will be coming your way, detailing the miscarriage of justice that this Topeka mother and daughter has endured in Kansas courts.  Please consider carefully how best you can help.  Claudine has been a strong voice for battered and abused mothers, having testified before State Rep Mike Kiegerl‘s (R-Olathe) Joint Committee on Children’s Issues in December 2009.

Claudine has been gagged, denied documents to her case, denied parenting time (AGAIN), and even had her phone confiscated from her.  She came to court with 67 violations of the last court order of daddy Hal Richardson keeping Rikki from seeing her mother.  I was in court with Claudine in January when the order was issued to finally allow visitation, and Judge David Debenham (Shawnee County Court, phone number (785) 233-8200 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting (785) 233-8200 end_of_the_skype_highlighting ext. 4203 ) looked Richardson in the eyes and pointed to him and told him he WILL follow the court’s order.  He didn’t, and the motion to find him in contempt was dismissed as soon as Claudine didn’t have all her supporters there.

Your constituents, the voters of Kansas, the mothers of Kansas must have your support.  Another is waiting in the wings to be stomped on in Wichita on Tuesday (Jones vs. Youngquist  Case no. 06-DM 3626).  A father, Shawn Jones, who allegedly sexually abused his young daughter, has kept the children from their mother, Tammy Youngquist.  She has not seen them in months.  This is the abuser’s way of punishing mothers, and courts gladly help.  Scientific studies show that children rarely lie about sexual abuse, yet child protection workers constantly disregard allegations if they come from children of a broken home.  WAKE UP AND REALIZE CHILDREN ARE IN PAIN HERE.  CHILDREN ARE BEING ABUSED AND CHILDREN ARE BEING RAPED AND KANSAS COURTS ARE HELPING THE PERPETRATORS.

This is from Earl Glynn, the Kansas Watchdog:

Claudine Dombrowski

Claudine Dombrowski: An abused mom victimized again by the Kansas Courts

Read details in written statement.

This is an truly incredible story that should never have happened in America.

Parts of the Kansas Judicial system should be disciplined for how it has victimized Ms. Dombrowski, who was an abused mom.

Instead of quotes from the audio, please consult these pages that document Dombrowski’s long and difficult battle to protect her daughter:

• Claudine Dombrowski Photos of Abuse

As you view these photos keep in mind that the court awarded FULL CUSTODY of their daughter to the “man” who did this to Claudine.

• Courts Have Continued Abuse of Manhattan Women, Manhattan Free Press, July 12, 2001.
• Manhattan resident fights custody battle for daughter, Kansas State Collegian, July 26, 2001.

State Rep Bill Otto: “No crime? You haven’t been guilty of anything? This is a court order that says you can’t go to any school functions?”

“I was under court order till 2004 to not even call the police after I was being beaten because … I was not ‘co-parenting’”

Dombrowski: “These friends of the court make recommendations to the judge. The parents … don’t have a right to see these documents. They do this behind closed doors.”

Otto: (To Secretary Jordan): “You have no rights as a parent …?”

Secretary Don Jordan: “This would be something extreme … I’m not familiar with the situation.”

Otto: “Can a judge do that? … Is that legal… ?”

Jordan: “Under the right circumstances … I hesitate to speculate.”

Sen. Roger Reitz: “This is something that only … the judicial system can really answer … It would be helpful … to have someone … representing the judicial system … to give us some ideas how this could happen.”

Dombrowski: “When you are a victim of domestic violence, and suddenly there’s a child involved, the typical …. power of control is that ‘I’ll take your children from you’. They will and they can the way the laws are setup.” …

“I was told that I’m not to talk to my daughter about the violence. That’s why I don’t see her. That’s why I see her supervised. He was criminally convicted. “

“When women try to get away from people who hurt them … I heard somebody say it’s really hard to believe you won’t call the police … I tell people not to contact the police, because as soon as you walk into court with a DV (domestic violence) and children, you’re already cutting your throat. You will lose your children. That’s the way it is right now.”

“… on the 16th of this month I’ll probably go to jail for breaking the gag order and talking about [being the victim of] violence as it relates to my case.”

Reitz: “… someone ought to be able to deal with this in a way that would address her problem. It doesn’t seem like we’ve done the right thing with regards to this little niche of the law.”

Dombrowski: “The criminal convictions are completely tossed aside and they don’t have any bearing on the family court … The eight criminal convictions that my ex had before getting custody of my daughter were completely dropped [in family court]“

Chair Kiegerl: “I cannot believe that abuse is totally ignored. I cannot believe you can prohibit a person from speaking about their own case.”

“The one thing [where] … I disagree with you is abuse should always be reported.”

State Rep Peggy Mast (R-Emporia): “Domestic violence is a control issue. Sexual abuse is a control issue. Is there any correlation between domestic violence and sexual abuse? Why is that not something that is considered when we take someone to [family] court that has a history of domestic violence?”

Dombrowski: “Yes. That is something I’ve asked myself for 16 years. … It comes back to the family court that has a veil of immunity. … They don’t fully understand the impact of the violence. What battered women have … if they report the abuse, then they’re failing to protect their child … if they don’t report the abuse, they’re still failing to protect their child. So, both ways, they’re going to lose their children …”

For anybody who abuses their wife … [from] a 1996 presidential task force … there is a 70% increase that those children will be abused and/or sexually abused after there’s been battery with the mother.

Sen. Oletha Faust-Goudea: “In 2004 …. I talked with the homicide department in Sedgwick County…. During that time there had been 21 homicides in Sedgwick County and 18 were due to domestic violence …”

“A lot of women do make those phone calls and unfortunately, sometimes it ends in their death.” …

“I want to apologize to you for being treated like a pedophile … not being able to go to a music concert.”

“I commend you for what you’re doing.”

Dombrowski: “I have not talked to my daughter in 10 years [except] for the confines of supervised visits. I’m not allowed to talk to her about anything. All she knows is what her dad has told her.”

See this video:  Abused Mom Wants Unsupervised Visits with Daughter

Others have indicated a desire to help.  I have uploaded the email addresses for the Kansas House here and the Kansas Senate here.  This is just the beginning.

Congratulations, Polanski-Defenders — Now the Child-Rapist Walks Free!

Johann Hari: Congratulations, Polanski-Defenders — Now the Child-Rapist Walks Free!.

So now we know. If you are a 44-year-old man, you can drug and anally rape a terrified 13-year-old girl as she sobs, says “no, no, no,” and pleads for her asthma medication, and face no punishment at all. You just have to meet two criteria: (a) You have to run away and stay away for a few decades, and (b) You need to direct some good films. If you manage this, not only will you walk free. There will be a huge campaign to protect you from the “witch-hunt” of the laws forbidding child-rape, and you will be lauded as a hero.

Polanski admitted his crime before he ran away, and for years afterwards, he boasted from exile that every man wants to do what he did. He chuckled to one interviewer in 1979: “If I had killed somebody, it wouldn’t have had so much appeal to the press, you see? But… fucking, you see, and the young girls. Judges want to fuck young girls. Juries want to fuck young girls. Everyone wants to fuck young girls!”

But this is not enough, it seems, for the Swiss government to return him to the United States to face trial. They have found a legalistic loophole that enables them to let him go – while admitting “national interests” may be a factor in the release. This may be a reference to pressure from neighboring France to free their citizen. As a Swiss citizen, I think I can say without being offensive – we all remember the bargains Swiss governments have made in the past to preserve their “national interests.” This is in a long tradition of helping criminals and calling it Swiss hard-headedness.

The campaign to release Polanski has leeched into the open a slew of attitudes that I thought were defeated a generation ago. Whoopi Goldberg said it wasn’t “rape-rape.” Others hinted darkly that she wasn’t a virgin at the time of the rape. So if a 13 year old has been raped before, she’s fair game for all future rapists?

The French philosopher Bernard-Henri Lévy, who led the campaign, said a little bit of child molestation isn’t his problem when Great Art is at stake. He wrote: “Am I repulsed by what he got up to? His behavior is not my business. I’m concerned about his movies. I like The Pianist and Rosemary’s Baby.” That’s worth saying again: this campaign was led by a man who thinks the drugging and raping of a child is “not my business,” when compared to a film about Satan inseminating Mia Farrow.

The novelist Robert Harris, who is a friend of Polanski’s, said: “It strikes me as disgusting treatment.” He wasn’t talking about the child-rape. He was talking about the attempt to punish the child-rape. He said Polanski was being subjected to a “lynch mob.” Where is this lynch mob? All I can see are people patiently suggesting the law should be enforced, and he should be given a fair and open trial. This is the polar opposite of a lynching: it is sober justice.

Do these defenders of Polanski understand what they are saying? Do they mean it? Harris has four children. If a great film director drugs and rapes them tomorrow, will he call the police, or will he say it would be “disgusting” to do so? Would he say the police and prosecutors trying to protect his children were a “lynch mob” and shoo them away? If the rapist ran off, would he say that after three decades on the run (boasting about his crime) he should walk free? I doubt it. So why do Harris’ words suggest he thinks Polanski’s victim is worth less than his own children?

Now the campaign has succeeded. So congratulations to Whoopi and Bernard and Robert: an unrepentant, bragging child-rapist won’t face his day in court, thanks in part to you. Have fun at the victory party. But — just a word of advice — you might want to leave your daughters at home.
Johann Hari is a writer for the Independent. To read more of his articles, click here or here.

You can follow Johann at http://www.twitter.com/johannhari101 or email him at j.hari [at] independent.co.uk

Declaration of Independence

Let Freedom Ring!

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of governed,  That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.

CALLING ALL ANGELS

We are coming President and Mrs. Obama…..will you listen?

Two rallies in one month regarding children being placed into the hands of their abusers and/or their Mothers abusers. What does this say to our President as he was presented last week with a silent vigil on Mothers Day. We are coming Mr. President…..will you listen?????

http://mothersoflostchildren.wordpress.com/2010/03/23/silent-vigil-to-be-held-at-the-white-house-on-mothers-day/

There have been many dodgy campaigns in the so called “rights for children”, but are in reality only there for the sole purpose of securing the child as though they were a piece of property.  Statistics can be skewed all they like, but at the end of the day most children are better off with their mothers after divorce.  Nature knows it, criminologists know it and deep down we all knew it, but because the shared parenting campaign sold as well as the renown pyramid scheme – we all fell for it.  Religious commentators might say that it was like scientists “playing god”, but in this case it was male supremacists, robbing motherhood.  In their own sense of paranoid delusions, they thought that single motherhood was an “invasion of feminism”, but its not.  Its mothers working extremely hard through all of the hate set against them to raise their children to become strong and good human beings.  That is all, no matter how one tries to paint it, there is no more.  Now, because children’s rights have never been so appalling along with women’s rights, mothers have embraced feminism like never before.  The support every year for the white ribbon campaign grows every year and more people, whether men’s groups like it or not are beginning to see through the FRs hatred and propaganda.  I can be very thankful to learn that Australians are certainly not a dumb country as much as these vial groups represent.  The more violent incidents against women and children, the more people begin to know who is the real problem.  The continued support by dads in distress, dads on air members and even fathers4equality of a known perpetrator is a statement in itself that reveals what this group is truly about: Its not about and never was about men’s rights – it was abusers rights.  The right to conceal, the right to punish victims, the right to continue their terror unchallenged and most of all: The right to have judicial authority to continue to do this.

Know that there is indeed a war on children and motherhood.

Know that a critical mass can stop this

Know that the courts are accomplices in some of the most disgusting crimes of the century beyond 9/11  If we put all of the victims of this child and mother massacre: it would be classified as the greatest act of terror and genocide by the state and its actors.

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