For decades now, mothers that have survived domestic violence and family court have continued to scream for justice, now they’re starving for it, literally. This week in Arizona a mother has made the ultimate sacrifice not only her body but for all mothers that are used and abused by the family court system, she has begun a hunger strike.
In Arizona a judge ordered that a mother be placed in jail for arrears in child support. Now mind you this mother does not get to see her children in a normal setting to begin with. This mother, like the thousands of others, is a “non-custodial” mother. She’s not just a “non-custodial” she is also a domestic abuse survivor, for whatever that’s worth these days anyways. A domestic violence survivor or victim will receive the worst treatment from the family court system than any other judicial “branch” (besides a rape victim). But it’s the same if you were raped it was YOUR fault, if you were abused it was YOUR fault. After 100 years of women in the early 19th century fighting for the right to vote we are still at a place where women are oppressed. We make less than men, work more and get our children taken away. Now if all that’s not bad enough at insult to injury when you are thrown into the family court arena. Now you are “forced” to “co-parent” with your abuser. That’s right, not only does he have access still to your life he then does everything in his powers (by way of his attorney who is the judges golfing buddy, oh and didn’t I tell ya…the judge knows the abusers dad…they go waaaay back, and the GAL oh yeah he’s golfing buddies with them all too). Once the abuser becomes the master manipulator that he is and gets by with a lot of help from his dads friends, soon gets custody. Then after that it continues with supervised visits (because you are a bad mother in whatever fictitious label they can pin on you) and soon after comes the child support because even though he makes more than you do with working two or three jobs… he can’t do it ALL BY HIMSELF. My mother did.
Family Court Judges, lawyers, psychologists and other supporters of female victims to interpret the effects and impacts of abuse as equivalent to passivity, incompetence, and poor mental health. So what can women and their supporters do to combat this social problem? http://www.speakoutloud.net/helping-women/language-of-resistance-in-family-court/
Mothers that have been abused should AVOID family court at all costs. They should run as fast as they can away, far far away from the abuser, because IF there isn’t “placement order” in place at the time of escape your chances are better than him tracking you down and THEN trying to get the children. ALWAYS have your children in YOUR care and custody. Even IF the abuser just wants to take the kids for “one night”. Do not fall for the trickery. Many mothers have lost their children this way. Either by the abuser claiming HE had custody (just as mine did) or running off with them or even worse, murder.
So with all this in mind you should also be “aware” that these travesties are not something “new” the courts are doing. This has been going on for decades. This started in the 1980′s when more mothers returned to work and became more independent and decided they didn’t need a “Mr. Mom”. When they began the child support system that spurned the phrase “dead beat dad” for the era that’s when the men folk starting fighting back and then abusers caught on that this system could work to their advantage since we wanted equality after all…didn’t we?
We did and we still do, but even in the year 2011 it is far off. The right to vote, 19 th amendment was the last and only rights that women have in the constitution. But if you want to count the 14th amendment which states,
No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.
Then again that would mean WE (as in women) have equality in this nation right? Not really. With the recent political atmosphere with state governments and their power grabs and war on women’s reproductive rights, we are losing “rights” every day. The women of the 1970′s that started a revolution of women yearning for the Equal Rights Amendment, here we are in the new millennium with only 38 states out of 50 that have “ratified” the ERA. How much longer?
Now, at this very moment an Arizona mother has taken all she can. Not unlike the women’s suffragists who went on hunger strikes for the right to place a ballot, she is too. This mother works two jobs and has limited contact, if any, to her children. Her abuser has hidden assets and comes from a very “well off” family. He’s not doing it because he’s starving, he’s doing it because he can. Years of family court conflicts, collusion and cronyism have taken its toll on this mothers soul. This woman has decided that she would rather starve and be hospitalized because it matters not what the courts can do to her, THIS is a politicized statement that the family court system is corrupt and we’re not taking it anymore. We’ve signed petitions, played the niceties with government officials who’ve gave us lip service, we’ve sacrificed our children and our savings accounts, we’ve marched the streets of Washington DC on Mother’s Day, we are done trying to get your attention, we DEMAND it now.
Yesterday was “Day One” of the hunger strike, we are now on “Day Two”. This mother says she must come up with $2,000 in 60 days or she will be put in jail, per judges orders. This mother is more deteremined than ever to get out of the circle jerk of family court. She’s lost everything but her free will. Perhaps this will be the one thing that she can conrol in her life since her abuser and his colluders continue their rage against her.
So Day Two is sliding into Day Three and I know with all my heart that the tenacity of this mother she is not giving up and we need to stand by her. I cannot with any good conscience not sound the trumpets for the triumphant return of the suffragists spirits to rise again with us and guide us to freedom of enlslavement of the patriarchy My prayer and mantra is that we begin our first voyage into the unknown world non-violent protest. I beg all victims of the family court system and their allies align their voices and let the world know we will not ignored. In the same vane as our Foremothers did and their daughters of the 70′s ERA movement. But this time we really DO get equal rights.
Stay tuned as this blog is about to expose EVERY one of the corrupt family court officials from Arizona